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Wednesday, 31 May 2017

Oi Mum - Share That Sofa!

Lotsa bitsa today.
Off to Sainsbury's. Lie under table while the meanies all munched bacon and sausages.
Around Sainsbury's including Mum's total refusal to allow me to guide her to the doggy department.
Into and around a bit of town.
Back to floatyboatyhome.
Back across town to a big hall. Fuss, admiration and greetings. Snooze through human yacketying. A tiny morsel of hoovering when Mum was messy with a biscuit.
More snoozing through more yacketying.
More fusses and admirations.
More around town including a shop where Mum got new pawcovers.
A mini freerun in Victoria Park - yipeeeeeeee!!
Back to floatyboatyhome.
Around town again.
Back to floatyboatyhome.
Oi! Mum.....share that sofa please!


Leaky skies. Leaky locks. Leaky eyes. It has been a bit of a damp day!

Leaky skies on and off all morning - including whiel I was swimming - well........I was a soggy doggy anyway so a little swim made no difference! Heehee!

Leaky locks - getting used to them now - it just means that we have a bit longer to wait for them to fill or empty = more time for fusses and admiration from passers by!

Leaky eyes - I have done my bestest to make Mum's mouth turn up at the corners. She was using her talkybone this morning and, it seems that Pappa was inside it. Her eyes leaked lots! Apparently today should have been Nanny's barkday, but she is celebrating in heaven. I just gave Mum my bestest loving.

We are back in Newbury again after cruising and towpath strutting. We are moored against my old ladydoggypal, Bess's floatyboatyhome. That means that, like in Thatcham, we have to go across her boat to get to the bank. I wonder how many times I can manage to sneak in and 'quality check' her yummies?

This evening, Bess's humans; Henry and Lin, came with us to the Bus of Hope. I snoozed through most of that! I have to admit that my eyelids were rather heavy. I did get some lovely fusses from some of the maximinihumans that visited the bus this eveing though.

Now....if you will excuse me..... I think Mummy needs my loving - serious sofasnuggles time!

Monday, 29 May 2017

New Bone - Sleeps well!!!

If there is any such thing as 'normal' in Oakleyworld, then today was something approaching that normal.

3 miles workywalkies into Thatcham town, around the Co-Wop then to Costa (carpet snooze time!) then back home to floatyboatyhome. Then more walkies along the towpath to deliver a squidgy block of slices in a bag to David and Mary. They have moved their floatyboat away a bit so it was a wonderfully long walkies. I .....errrrr....may...have just happened to slip into the river for a bit of a swim.....heehee! Got Mum wonderfully well with a bigshake too!

So, after about 5 miles of walking and a good swimming session too, I was quite happy to snooze away the rest of the day.

A new bone was a very welcome distraction from the close inspection of the insides of my eyelids. I think my jaws rather needed that bit of exercise!

Shall We?

Jeepers! That was a heck of a day!

A quick play on the towpath with Lilly, then a car ride to a church in Newbury. Nice comfy carpet to snooze on - I approved - so much so that I stayed snoozing while Mum and Dad went up on the raised floor bit and did a load of yacketying into black lollipops. Mum came back after a few minutes but Dad stayed up there for ages. Apparently he was doing something called 'preaching'. It seems that this preaching thing meets with human approval - lots of the humans there told him afterwards that it was good. I double like that church - not only comfy carpet but also a garden area to explore while all the hot brown drinks bit happens!

Next came a workywalkies around Newbury - including those bleepy crossings that dispense yummies when I 'hup-touch' to show Mum where the buttons are! Six of them for one set of corssings makes for a delicious bit of working!

That was followed by another car ride back to Thatcham where all the floatyboats are. There were gazillions of visitors! It was crazy busy but I survived it by largely just lying down on the grass under a chair. I did emerge to meet and greet passing pooch pals though!

This evening, once all the visitors had gone, it was workywalkies time again - up the road to Thatcham Baptist Church - another comfy carpet! Another welcome snooze while the humans all did a vast amount of yacketying and howling.

What came next was a most unexpected and pleasant little treat: It started off as a workywalkies with Dad alongside too. We discovered a park area. Mum said 'shall we? Just for a little relax?' Well....yeeeeesssss!!! Please Mum!!!!! We did! I got a little freerun - nothing special - just a gentle jog around the field - but it was a lovely relax! Aaaaaahhhhhhh!

We completed the workywalkies back to floatyboatyhome where we spent the evening chilling on the towpath. The humans were all enjoying stinky red water in those bowls-on-stalks, plus cheese and biccies. I did get a seriously yummy couple of morsels of cheese! I love my Mummy! I love Cheese!

Sunday, 28 May 2017


zzzzzz....... That's Mummy now! She seems to be absolutely compooperated! And all she has done is a whole load of yackety-yackety-yack-yack-yacking!

This morning, I took Daddy walkies while Mum 'got on with preparing' - whatever that means....??? That, of course is not a complaint at all - I got to have a fantabulous game of chase with with Lilly, the fellow floatyboatydog.

Most of the day was then spent either snoozing inside our floatyboatyhome or out on the towpath where we met with gazillions of humans, minihumans, other doggypals and - above all, Henry - a colleague! Henry is a fellow guide dog - a big black hairy beast who looks after Karen, his ladyhuman. We didn't get to do anything more exciting than meet, greet and kanoodle, but it is always great to meet a colleague!

There were some manhumans doing something extremely yummy-smelling: They had some huge bowl things that were really hot, and on cage things on top,they had super-yummies - sausages and flat round things. Humans were putting these into white squidgy things and then munching them. My mouth did some serious dripping at that but to no avail. Hummmmphhhh!

This evening, I took Mummy workywalkies on a slightly roundabout route (no complaints - we explored some twittens and therefore new routes - always good and exciting!) to the church where we have been a few times in the last week. We went inside and I got to chill out while Mum and Dad, plus some other floatyboatyhumans put chairs in rows and put human-drinking-bowls in rows and twiddled knobs and various other strange things. More humans arrived and sat in the seats, with hot brown stuff in their humandrinkingbowls. After a little while, Mum went up on the raised floor and did ooooooooodles of yachetying. She had a tiny little lollipop attached to her fursubstitute. I could hear her from a box on the wall.
While she was yacketying, I got to curl up and relax under some chairs, at the paws of some of my humanfriends.

Mum was telling everyone all about our story. Pictures of me and Mum and others appeared on the white wall behind her. At the end, I got to demonstrate some of my obedience! That was worth doing - yummy worth doing! Obedience = treats!

At the end of all this, everybody banged their front paws together, stuff was packed away,and, eventually we left. I took Mummy workywalkies on another extended, roundabout route home to our floatyboat. After finding several of our floatyboatyhumanfriends standing on a corner munching hot yellow yummysticks from paper packs, we went via some of the twittens and Mum got disorientated as it was getting dark. She asked me then to 'find the way home'. Well, I knew the way - via the corner where all the munching was going on! I headed straight there! The humans had gone, but they had left mess behind them on the pavement! Well....I couldn't possibly leave that mess there could I? I mean.....that would have been so wrong! Hoovering dutifully done, I guided Mum home to our floatyboatyhome.

We had to wait at the cage across the road while a very fast and noisy train went by. Then, once we reached the towpath again, I got to have a bit of a play with Lilly again! I think I'm falling in love......Lilly is a bit littler than me and she is a very pale golden labrador. She is fantabulous fun! She found a huge stick and we had a game of chase with it. At one point I got possession of it and ran off with it along the towpath. Lilly's humanmum, Sue. yelped as I ran past her. She says I am lacking in spacial awareness when I am running with a big stick in my mouth......... Ooopsie!

Now, Mum seems to have a humandrinkingbowl on a stick and it is filled with stinky red water. She is on the sofa......I think it is sofasnuggles time!

Saturday, 27 May 2017

Bark Shire!

Workyploddies was about all we could manage today - three and a quarter miles of it. Even on a new route, which would normally get me lots of 'Whoa. Steady' commands from Mum , I still couldn't muster my usual enthusiasm. It was faaaaarrrrr too hot for being energetic.

It was a nice walkies though and it did have a lovely cool bit in the middle when we went into a shop called the Co-Wop. That was a nice little new challenge. I managed to find the bread aisle for Mum when she was burbling about needing it.

We also stopped in the town centre bit where there were lots of those shops with flappy walls and roofs. They weren't there last time we went. We found some of our floatyboaty human friends there - of course that meant oooooodles of human yacketying. I just laid down for a rest on the grass. Eventually, after a session of talkybones being aimed at us, with various combinations of the humanfriends joining us, we got to leave and complete our plod.

I have largely snoozed away the rest of the day while Mum and Dad have both been busy doing loads of clicketyfingersing.

Ooh! I nearly forgot - before we went out Mum had to yackety with a ladyhuman with a huge black lollipop. There was a car parked beside the boats and it had big sticky-uppy things on the roof. Apparently, this was called an Outside Broadcast on BeeBeeSee Radio Barksheer. I didn't See any Bees or hear any barking but I stood like a good boy while the yacketying went on. Mummy said nice things about me and about Guide Dogs, as well as about what we are all doing here with our floatyboatyhomes.

Thursday, 25 May 2017


Minihumans. Gazillions of them! All together in one room.......aaaaaggggghhhhhh!

Mum said we were going for a toddle. At least I thought that was what she said.....I then heard something about a toddler group.......I don't think that is a pleasant wandering kind of toddle is it?

There was one little girlyminihuman who was nice. She did some soothing ear-strokes and belly rubs. After she finished adoring me though, I managed to crawl, commando-style, under the chair Mum was sitting on. She was yacketying with a grownup ladyhuman so she didn't notice my slinking away to safety.

After all the yacketying and playing and minihumanhowling was over, I got to help with the clearing up and putting away. Mum and the other ladyhumans were busy putting wheeliething and noisythings and all sorts of boxes of colourful things away into a big cupboard. By the time they had finished doing that I had managed to put away aaaaallllll the tasty crumbs of biccies left scattered all over the floor by all those minihumans. Now that kind of putting away is good to do!

Workywalkies back again after that was a bit ploddy - it was very hot. Mum kept us on the shady side of the road, so we then had to cross over at a busy place instead of at the bleepycrossing. I did good! We made it!

Most of the rest of the day has been spent snoozing on the floor at the back of the boat. It was a bit cooler there - and it was safely out of the way of the hoards of slightly bigger minihumans who were visiting our floatyboatyhomes today.

A slightly cooler workywalkies this evening was nice though, even if we did have to wait aaaaaages at the cage door that came down across the road and pavement when the train came by.



"Stay out of the water" said Mum......just too late! Heehee! I was already in the river! Ooooh it was lovely!

"Big shake" - well that I can do on command - just perfectly aimed to soak everyone around rather well I think!

"Nooooooo....don't roll in the dust."

"Go swim again. Rinse it all off" - Okay! Don't mind if I do!

"Big shake" - got 'em again! 

"Roll on the grass....Nooooo! Not the dust, you numpty! Oh! I give up!" 

Heeheeheeee! That white cloth is no longer white! The towel is s delightful shade of yuck too!

Before all of this, I had donated my bone to Bess, the old ladydog next door. She is enjoying gnawing on it. I think I heard Mum say something about getting a new one out for me.......I shall have to carry out my old ones more often and present them to a fellow pooch......

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

My Life is SUCH hard work!!!

Workywalkies. Fuss & admiration. Car ride. Fuss & admiration. Walkies. Fuss & admiration. Chill out on towpath. Fuss & admiration. Walkies. Swim. Fuss but less admiration (it seems humans are less admiriing of a soggy doggy!). Car ride. Bus ride. Fuss & admiration.

It is tough being me sometimes. Will my head and ears get worn out or will they get more shiny with being polished?

Tuesday, 23 May 2017

Just Desserts...


It seems I am welcome aboard our friends' floatyboats, but not quite so welcome as to help myself to yummies! Sorry Bess. Those yummies were just so begging me to check them out though...... apparently they are supposed to be good for dogs' teeth....... I was only testing the theory........Mum was a right meanie......she confiscated the rest of the pack and errrrr.... .escorted me from the premises! I couldn't complete the testing. Mum was even meanier when it came to my dinner.....I got less than usual. Harrumph!

Monday, 22 May 2017


WOW! I have 2000 likes! Mum says that is a big big number! Can I please have a yummy for each one - then I might get a better idea of just how big that number is.......please? Well.....it would help me to understand.......

It has been a largely lazy chilled out day today. I took Mum and Dad, plus all the rest of the floatyboatyhumans to a church this morning. I like that church; it has comfy carpet and good hoovering! Then, after the return workywalkies, I have played on and off all afternoon with Lilly and a whole load of passing pooch pals here on the towpath. In between plays and meet-n-greets, I have enjoyed snoozing on the grass in the warmth fro the fireball in the sky.

This evening, we went to a different church where I got to snooze under a chair on another comfy carpet. Mum and Dad went up on the raised floor and did some yacketying with a black lollipop.
I have now just returned from taking Daddy for a nice leisurely evening walkies and now, with Mummy-sofa-snuggles, my eyelids seem rather heavy........zzzzzz


Ooooh! I was glad of that freewalkies along the towpath and the swim in the river. Welllllll.....It just had to be done! There was a little inlet just begging me to go in......I did my bestest to dry myself off on the muddy towpath afterwards but Mum wasn't too impressed with my efforts. She threw my squeaky spacehopper back into the river so I had to go retrieve it again. Then, before I got chance to roll again to desoggy, we were off along the towpath again! I found some long grass. That seemed to appease her.

The day started off with a meeting and greeting with a ladyhuman called Morven. Her black lab had brought her walkies along the towpath. I knew there was something special about that doggypal. She is a withdrawn colleague! The ladyhuman is apparently a Guide Dogs workyperson who makes sure we dogs are looked after properly and kept in good health. She said I look good! Well, of course I do! Apparently she lives near here so we might see more of her. I hope so. I rather fancy a good playtime with a colleague - withdrawn or not - we are still of the same big family!

We then set off in the car to Newbury where we went into a room with lots of ladyhumans. There were yummies too but not much hoovering. They were all too clean at their eating! I did wander along the full length of the undertable but found very little. I did get some fusses and admiration though. Mum stood up and did some yacketying and then they all banged their front paws together. At that, I stood up and took a rather splendid bow! I do like to be admired!

Next came a long car ride and I didn't like that! The sky was all leaky and so there was a lot of loud sloshy noises from underneath me. I got a bit puffypanty. But I survived and we went into a big building where there were lots of seats. It was dark in there so I had to find the seat for Mummy. I also found Puppa! That made my tail wag!

We settled down and watched lots of humans on the big raised floor. In front of the raised floor was a bit of lowfloor. Down in there we spotted Debbi (my biggest humansister). She was tickling the black and white teeth on a noisebox. There were other humans doing banging and parping and twanging down there too. When they did that, the humans on the raised floor did some humanhowling. Mum says it was all called 'Legally Blonde'. Apparently it was very good. The bit I was most interested in was when doggypals appeared on the raised floor. There was a tiny one that was only carried on in human paws, but another one got to walk for himself. I would have so loved to go meet and greet them but it wasn't to be. Huff!

Afterwards, we all went walkies around town (Epsom apparently) and found a human yummyery. More lying under the table for me! And it all made my dinner late too! Hooooowwwwllllll! I had to wait until we got back to the car, then I had a picnic in the boot!

The long journey home was OK and dry for almost all the way. That was better. When we arrived, I got to take Mummy for a lovely stroll along the towpath. She enjoyed the after-journey unwind too. She didn't join me in the swimming bit though. She said it was too cold. What a wuss!

Saturday, 20 May 2017

Cruising Again!

6 miles, 5 locks and 2 swingbridges. We workywalkiesded most of that but did cruise a bit of it. Well....it was Daddy's Barkday today so we kept him company for a while!

We are now in Thatcham with loads of floatyboatyfriends and, most importantly, two of my fellow floatyboatydoggypals; Bess the senior lab x collie and Lilly the little yellow lab. Happy reunions!

This evening, after all that cruising, walking and locking, there was more workywalkies to do. i guided Mum, along with aaaallll of the humans to the town to a human yummyery. Of course that meant I then spend the evening under the table - in the tiniest hope of a dropped morsel - it turned out to be a completely vain hope; not a crumb! Not an atom! Lots of fusses and admiration though! That is always welcome.

The return workywalkies was in the dark so I had to step up for Mummy. i did have to stop for a doggy download so Mum and I, along with Mary got left behind by all the other humans. No problem though. Mum just asked me to 'Find the way'. I lifted my head, strided out and we caught them all up at the bleepy barriers where the clicketyclack lines go across the road. Just after I downloaded, and of course, Mum had parcelled up my precious offering, I led Mum to a bin. As it was dark, she hadn't spotted it. She was super pleased with me and told me what a super good clever boy I am. I made sure I got my edible proof - jsut to be sure I know for definite that I really am clever!

Now, if you will excuse me, I have some bonework to catch up on. I haven't had much chance to do any all day!

Photo of me taken from above, lying on the back deck of the boat as we cruise along. I am lying with my front paws out in front of me, watching the water drift by.

Friday, 19 May 2017

I Got a Bone!!!!

Yummy end to a good workywalkies.

I took Mum and Dad into town, via the slightly longer route. We went into a few shops where Mum asked the workypeople to stick a flappy rectangle with squiggles on it into the windows. Some said yes - that made Mum and Dad's mouths go up at the corners! (Apparently these flappy rectangles are telling all the humans in town what is going to be happening soon). Then we went to the super-yummy red and white striped shop. I got a bone! Yippeeeeee! Well.... three bones actually! A red and white striped manhuman used a shiny to-and-fro thing to make one bone into three! I like three better than one!

Then we went to a big important building that Mum says is called the Town Hall. In there, we met some ladyhumans and I got some lovely ear-rubs while Mum and Dad did some yacketying.

Next stop was the car and a little ride so Daddy could use his one-eyed-clickybox. For me, that was just a brief snooze opportunity.

Before all of  this, another workywalkies to Sainsbury's got my mouth dripping but Mum and Dad failed to recognise my plight under the table: They didn't drop a single crumb! How mean was that?!! I then did my duty all the way around the whole shop before I got a chunk of carrot at end of the checkout bit. That was worth having! Yummmmm.

Much more worth having than even a chunky carrot is this scrummylicious bone! I am one happy boy!

Photo - close up of the top of my head - nose down at my huge bone - the knobblyknuckle end of a cow's thigh apparently.

Thursday, 18 May 2017

Baggage and EmanEss...

Baggage! That's what I am, apparently!

I took Mummy on another adventure to Reading. A very soggy workywalkies to the train station, a ride in the normal civilised manner between seats to Reading, more soggy workywalkies around all the shoppyplaces ending in a wonderful kanoodling session!

We went into some shop called EmanEss where a nice manhuman took us up in the magic box (the one that changes outside when the doors shut and open again), then into a big room where we met two of my colleagues. Three black beauties together for the afternoon! We have never met before but we are family! We are Guide Dogs and we know it! There was Casper the hugenormous GSDxGoldie and Olivia the girlie black lab. We had a fantabulous time of kanoodling and mutual ear chewing. Oh....and we did some good work too - making ourselves available for admiration from the EmandEss workyhumans who came to visit!

Then came time to guide Mum back again. We wandered a bit more aroudn the shoppyplaces first and Mum got a new pair of pawcovers, before we headed off to the station.

When we got ont he train, it was really crammed with humans. The only space for me was under a sort of benchthing. So that was where I had to ride! Mum says it was the baggage rack! At least it kept me from getting trampled on. Actually, it was quite nice under there - I had room to stretch out on the carpet! Perhaps being baggage is kind of OK!

Photo of me lying down under the baggage rack on the train.

Photos of today's meet n greet at EmanEss Reading.  

Me bowled over by Olivia. (Me lying on my back displaying my best bits to Olivia black labrador).

Kasper the huge black GSD x Goldie, Me and Olivia - all three with heads together discussing our strategies.

Kasper lying to the left all calm and serene while Olivia and I get on with the serious business of kanoodling as best we could when we were supposed to be on our best behaviour representing The Guide Dogs for the Blind Association (UK).

Wednesday, 17 May 2017

Double Grooming!

Haha Hehe..... sorted out Mum's daftness. She gave me a super duper grooming session. That was really nice - a good all over fuss is never to be declined and the minty mouth froth whiskerstick scrub is a yummy finale. However, she finished by saying "What a smart boy!" Well! THAT had to be sorted out!

A few moments later I spotted my opportunity: I grabbed the chance to escape. "Houdini" was what Mum called me for that. I think the name she called me when I returned was something along the lines of "little giftbag". That grass and mud and stream were just perfect for sorting out the mess she had made of me!

It all resulted in yet another fuss/grooming session! Result!

Tuesday, 16 May 2017

I Wish to Report the Theft of a Packet...

We've moved! We are no longer in the floatyboatykennel. We have move all the way (haha) to the other side of the canal. This is great news as it means I don't always have to be on lead to go out to do what a doggy has to do. I can nip off of our floatyboatyhome and down into the bushes beside the towpath. This also means that, if I get my timing just right and Mum or Dad look let their attention slip for just a moment, I can sneak off to investigate a little way along the way

These little investigations led to the discovery that we are moored right next to the floatyboatyhome belonging to my doggypal Bess. I couldn't get her attention so I carefully left my calling card outside for her. Dad was really mean though; he came straight along and removed it! Wrapped it in a bag and had the audacity to put it in a bin! How am I supposed to leave my love letters for my girlfriend if he's going to do that? Huff!

Monday, 15 May 2017

What a Fun Day!

Heeheehee! Well.... THAT worked a treat! Soggy belly.......no harness! Yessss!

Actually, of course, I love my job and I don't mind at all when Mum puts my harness on me. It means I get to strut my stuff looking after her. I did my fair share of that today; about 6 miles of so of it: to and from church, around Lidl's and then around a hoooooooooggggeeenormous garden place. I thought it was going to be workywalkies all the way - even though it was a sort of parkyplace. Mum says it was called The Vyne - National Trust place. 

After a long workywalkies around the place though, we came to a woodland trail. Mum asked me to 'sit' and took off my harness and lead/noseband. Then came that bestest of all command 'Go play'! Yaaayyyyyhaaayyyyhayyhayyhayyyy! Dad did my job of looking after Mum. (Thanks Dad!) and I had a good old romp around.

I found a place for a delectable cool down sploshy session. I shall make note of the consequences - Mum said she couldn't really harness up a soggy scruffamuffin so I only got to go back on lead when we got to the bit where I was no longer allowed to freerun. Reeeeesult!

Various photos of my freerun
Running and sniffing about in the undergrowth, wading shoulder deep in the stream, catching a yummy in mid air and sitting patiently waiting for Dad when he disappeared to the manhumans spending room.

Sunday, 14 May 2017

Parked Like a Twat.

"What a good boy!" I like to hear that from Mummy. I did my job good!

I was workywalkiesing Mummy through Newbury when I had to halt us. There was a car parked right smack bang in the middle of the pavement. Blocking our way completely. Now, normally, I would take Mum to the kerb and wait for her to work out that I am taking her offkerb to go around the obstacle. This time it was different though. This was a nasty road with big beastie vroomy things whizzing by. Not a safe option for an off kerb. Mum stood for a few moments trying to work out the best thing to do. She was muttering to me stuff like 'I guess we will have to turn back .....go the longer way around.....' Then a ladyhuman got out of the car and came up to us. She said something about 'Sorry .......wait 10 minutes and I will be out of the way.....'

Mum was not amused. I could feel her getting stroppified. She said something about that parking on the pavement breaking something called the law....... Then the ladyhuman got all megastroppy and started angrybarking at Mummy. Then with a big huff (better than I can huff!) she stomped off into the road and stuck her front paws up in the air. This made the cars stop coming. Then she barked something at Mum and Mum, all flusterified, asked me to 'Find the way round'. Of course I did and we carried on our way, but stroppyladyhuman yelled something else at Mum as we passed her.....
The rest of our workywalkies was very uneventful. Dad picked us up in the car and we went off for a little ride before returning back to floatyboatyhome to receive visitors. That meant a nice long snoozetime for me.

I'm carefully looking after Mum's leg now - under my head! Night night.....

Saturday, 13 May 2017

Black Bits, Flashy Bowls and Buzzy Machines...

Mum says this shows why I am needed. She says this blob shows how tiny her window of vision is. This is why I have to work so hard to keep her from bumping into things. She can't see anything around her edges. She says the black bits are where she doesn't see anything. The little white bit in the middle is where she can see. Today was quite a good eyes day so she did see about as well as she is likely to.

This morning, I had to guide her to Specsavers. She then put her head right close in front of a big upright bowl thing. It had little lights flashing inside it and she was supposed to press a button when she saw one of the lights. She didn't press the button at all, so the nice ladyhuman bleeped some other buttons and then Mum did the flashy bowl thing again. This time she did press the button a very few times. 

It was all a bit boring really. I just made use of the carpet for a snooze! Next, I had to take her to a little shop across the road. The manhuman in there took her shinysticks that she uses to open the front door of the boat and to operate the control boxes on the bridges across the canals. Mum often tries to use the wrong one because they are both the same shape. The nice manhuman in that little shop made a nasty bbvvvvvzzzzz noise with a machine and Mum was delighted to find that he had made one of the shinysticks a different shape. Now she can tell them apart! Yayy!

This afternoon, I rescued Daddy by taking him out for a nice long leisure walkies. When we got back we found we had definitely had a lucky escape. Our floatyboatyhome smelled of loads of that stuff she uses when she gets carried away with stroking cloths and whiskersticks and things. I did manage to come back with slightly damp paws so I sorted out some of the mess Mum had made with all her strange doings!

Photo shows Mum's field of vision test printout for her right eye. (Left eye is not measurable, as it really doesn't work at all). It is a black blob with a tiny white section just to the left of the centre.

Friday, 12 May 2017

Bum Sniffs!

Under the table. That's where I've spent a lot of my time today, while all the humans have been non-stop yackety-yackety-yackyackyacking. Their form of communication is soooooooo blimmin long and drawn out! What's wrong with a quick bum sniff? That tells every detail needed! Their eating takes ages too. 30 seconds is all I need to gallumph my meals. They seem to take hours over it!
Dogs vs humans in superiority contest = NO contest!

Thursday, 11 May 2017

Poked and Prodded!

SIX AND A QUARTER MILES! That's how far I've workywalkiesded Mummy today. It has been hot too and she has the audacity to call me Ploddypaws! Huffffffff!

Actually, the slow-down-protest was because we were heading back instead of going further on more adventures. Going back is boring! More adventures is much more exciting.

This morning's workywalkies was to the vet! Apparently I needed my regular 6-monthly check up. Mr Vetman poked and prodded all my delicate places, then terrified me with his shiny ear-tube thing, but I survived having that pressed against my chest. I rolled over on my back. It was much less scary that way up! Then he got a shiny biter and bit a chunk off one of my claws! He stole a bit of me! Hoooooowwwwwllllll! 

He did say I was all good though. My numbers are good at 29kg and all my pokey and proddy bits are apparently in good order.

I think I should have got some kind of edible apology for all that shenanegins. All I got was a pat on the head from Mr Vetman! I want to go back to the vet I saw last time - she had yummies! I do remember she stuck her pawpointers where I didn't want them, but she had yummies! That makes the rest OK. Maybe next time......

This evening, I took Mum and Dad out of the floatyboatyhomekennel, over the bridge and back along the towpath. There, we met some humanfriends on their floatyboatyhomes, and, more importantly, my pooch pal, Bess! I got to go snooze on her floatyboatyhome for a while too! Yayhayy!

Photo of me lying on my back while Mr Vetman does his poking and prodding stuff.

Wednesday, 10 May 2017

University Trip!

Today's fuss-fest. It is such hard work being so admired! Aaaaalllll those ear-rubs. Aaaaaallllll the belly tickles. And, of course a good dose of kanoodling with other Guide Dogs and a GuideDogPuppyInTraining.

All of this adoration came after a good workywalkies taking Mummy to the train station, then on the train, then around Reading shoppyplace, then on the bus, then around the University grounds. Then, after all that hard work being irresistible, I had to workywalkies the return journey - and that included finding the way around the University grounds to 'Find the bus stop' when Mum couldn't work out which way to go. 

Then, after a brief time back home aboard floatyboatyhome, including a quick dinner, we were off out again - this time in the car with Daddy, to go play on the big bus and get yet more adoratiion from the bigminihumans.

Now, if you will excuse me, I really do have an enormous need for beauty sleep. Mummy......leg here please......my head is very very heavy.......zzzzzzzzzz

Tuesday, 9 May 2017

Huff, Huff and Treble HUFF!

Dullelm! Nice little outing! I don't think so!

That's what Mum said when she harnessed me up this morning: Just a nice little outing and then back for a quiet day.' Well! I can think of plenty of places that would fit the bill of 'nice'. Dullelm is NOT one of them! There is nothing even remotely sniffably interesting in there! Nothing even vaguely edible! Just boring old human stuff. Huff! Huff! Huffety Huff! I registered my protest by lying down at the end of the aisle while Mum did her browsing thing. Thanfully, she didn't do much of it this time. Just one aisle, then 'Come on Sulkysocks. Find the downsteps'. 'Find the checkout'. 'Find the door'. and finally 'find the way home'. I plodded as slowly as I could possibly manage........

It has been nice to snooze and relax with my bone for the day though. All rounded off with a nice leisure walkies this evening with Daddy. We came back to find Mummy with purple headfur. She really does do some strange things.......

Huff! Apparently midnight is an inappropriate time to be doing serious work on my bone! But...but...but.... I simply have to finish getting that deliciously gooey bit out of the middle! It's not my fault it clonks so loud on the wooden floor!

Monday, 8 May 2017


Today has been a curious mixture.

First of all, I set out taking Mum workywalkies to church. Dad had gone in the car. After a while of walking, Mum suddenly stopped and got out her talkybone. She asked it to 'Call Tim'. A few moments later, Dad appeared in the car and whisked us off to church. It seems that Mum had got the directions all wrong and we were heading in completely the wrong direction! Duh! Oh well, it was a nice walk while it lasted!

When I say that Dad drove us to church, I need to clarify: It was a different church, but he dropped Mum and me off and drove away again. Most odd! Mum asked me to find the gate', then up the path and 'find the door'. We went into the big pointy building and found some very nice humans to meet and greet inside. After finding a seat for Mum (it was one of those long wooden bench seats inside a sort of box), i settled down to snooze through the human howling. Afte a llttle while, Mum harnessed me up again and I had to take her up the front. She was given a black lollipop with a long tail and she did some yacketying into it. It was really strange; I could hear her humanbark as normal beside me, but also bigger and louder from a box on the wall! I just laid down to soak up the admiration.

I also had to guide Mum up to the front again, up a few steps, where she got down on her knees and got given a little round yummy and a drink. I did my bestest sit beside her but I didn't get anything! Huffffff! Not fair!

After a bit more human howling and some more yacketying, we left and workywalkied around the corner to our normal church. Dad was up front with his dumdumdum noisestick. That is why he didn't come with us!

After all that, I had to guide Mum briefly around a bit of Sainsbury's then we went off in the car to a house where we found some humanfriends and a couple of doggypals in the garden. All the humans were noshing but, when that was done, we went for a lovely walkies/freerun around a woods. I got to freerun most of it but was on lead for some of it too. The ground was quite rough so I looked after Mum. I showed her the way around the rough bits and helped to keep her safe. Even when I'm not on duty, I love my Mummy and like to do what I can to keep her safe. It was easier for her to follow my bum that to walk holding paws with Daddy on some of the narrow bits!

I had to sit in amongst all the blue flowers to pose for Daddy to point his one-eyed-clickybox at me. I was a bit miffed about this because it meant I missed the opportunity to chase a feathered toy across the woods. Mum says that was another reason I was on lead. She says that pheasants are not Oakley toys. I think she is very wrong but the walkies was nice anyway.

Photo of me sitting among a mass of bluebells.

Sunday, 7 May 2017

Playdate. Yayhay!

Bestest day EVER! WoooohooooWayyhayy!

Workywalkies into town, then on to Northcroft Park. Then a bit of a chillout time waiting......Then..... a car came into the carpark......Mum, Dad and I went onto the field and then ......Oh my wagging tail! My Puppymummy Sue, Puppydaddy Mike and Guide Dog Puppy Raymond!!!!! I may have gone just a smidgen berserk! Oh happy day! Oh waggy tail!

The bestest freerun - all over the big up-the-hill park, then along a wonderful new route along a path that took us throught woods and then to the river and canal. Silly Mummy had got ideas that we would stay dry! Haaahaaahaaa! She is just so daft! How could a pair of Labradors possibly stay dry when there is a river to be explored?

Ooooh! It was fantabbydabbydoozee!

But now I seem to be feeling rather dozy.......I shall leave you with a selection of photos of today's fun.

Saturday, 6 May 2017

Strutting my Stuff Again!

Team towpath - back in action again today! Yayyy!

We like to get in a bit of practice from time to time!

Today started off with a long workywalkies to Tesco's, via the extended route. Then, shortly after we got back, visitors arrived. Humanfriends of Mum & Dad's. Apparently, this Dave manhuman used to be Dad's boss. He is a nice boss! Apparently they live in some place far far away, called China, but they came to visit. The ladyhuman had a strange humanbark that I didn't understand. I wonder if they have doggypals in this China place? I wonder if they understand their humans?

After vast amounts of yacketying and noshing aboard our floatyboatyhome, we set off cruising. It was fantabulous! We only went cruising just for the pleasure of going cruising, but it meant that Mum and I got to strut our stuff along the towpath, there and back again, working the three locks and a swingbridge twice each. It's where we belong. Mum says it is good practice for when we get on the move again soon... I like the sound of that!

Friday, 5 May 2017

Oops. Disgraced Myself...

Booo! :( Back at the floatyboatykennel! I'm already missing that huge 'garden'. I think I have heard Mum say something about returning again soon though.... :)

Before we left this morning though, I had a fandabbydoozy play iwith a fellow Guide Dog - well a puppy in training.... 11 month old Spring the yellow Lab x Retreiver girlie. That was a delightful enounter in that park/garden. We did big zoomies together and a fair bit of chase and ear-chewing too! Woohoo! It is always good to play with doggypals, but even better to play with a colleague!

We then cruised back to the floatyboatykennel with human guests aboard. Two ladyhumans who came along just for the ride.

This afternoon, I took Mum workywalkies into town and then to Sainsbury's. I met a humanfriend in there; Terry who used ot live on a floatyboatyhome. Terry does supergood ear rubs! I likeTerry! I also found a ladyhuman in a wheelieseat. Mum tried to tell me to go straight on, but I just knew that ladyhuman needed my loves. I tugged Mum over and just laid my chin on the ladyhuman's lap. It made her mouth go up at the corners! We stayed for a few minutes while the humans did a bit of yacketying; just long enough for me to show her my loves!

We then walked back home after Daddy come to take all the goodies. (Mum couldn't carry them all). On the way, when we were doing the bleepycrossings, I found another colleague to greet. I wasn't allowed to much in the way of proper greetings though becaue this Guide Dog was with a manhuman who was learning how be looked after by my colleague. There was a Guide Dogs Mobility Instructor with them. i had to behave! We dogs did get to rub noses briefly though! Maybe we will meet up again sometime.

This evening, we went out again to humanfriends' house. When we arrived in the car, I may have.....erm.....disgraced myself somwhat! Ahem! Errrrmmmm.....Ooopsie! Well.....I was still in the boot of the car when this hissing furball appeared outside. I shouted at it but it still kept strutting across the gardens. Mum waited before opening the carbumdoor, thinking the beast had gone. Well....I knew better! I knew it hadn't gone very far.....and I knew exactly where it was. I may have forgotten my manners .....and maybe I forgot a smidgen of my obedience too......Mum did say something about 'Stay' 'Wait' but that hissing furball made me go temporarily deaf! I......errr.....kind of exploded out of the car and rocketed off to sort out that monster! Mum was not impressed! I got a serious telling off! Oops!

I did see off that hissing furball though! 

2 photos of me with Spring the Guide Dog puppy in training today. In both, Spring is on the left and I am on the right. We are sitting on the grass. In one of the pics, Spring has her big pink tongue hanging out of the side of her mouth and we are looking at each other. In the other pic, we are kissing.


Thursday, 4 May 2017

I Like it Here!

Please can we stay on this mooring? Please can we? Please? Please?

Even going out for workywalkies means a freerun and playtime with lots of poochpals first - and on the way back too!

Work and play combined = happy Oakley!

Monday, 1 May 2017


I am absolutely Jaspered! That is not a complaint though. It has been another fandabbydoozee day here on our park mooring. I LOVE LOVE LOVE it here!

I got a good zoomies session in this morning, including a swim (I am totally sure that Mum really wanted me to do this but it was great anyway - and resulted in a good towelrub session!).

Then, on my next session outside, I was busy playing with a couple of passing pooches when I spotted a long-lost buddy coming across the park towards us. It was Jasper the little Staffie x Frenchie! Yippeeeeeeeee! That was a joyful reunion! Last time I played with Jasper he was a tiny puppster! Today, he was nearly as big as me! Oh! Boy! Did we have a fantabulous day of playing zoomie-chase across this huge park field!

Even inside our floatyboatyhome, while the humans did all their inevitable yacketying and noshing, Jasper and I still managed to carry on playing a bit - in an indoors-restricted-space-kanoodling kind of way.

Then we got another mega zoomies session outside again before Jasper had to take his humans home again. I did stand and watch sadly as they walked off across the field, but I got my dinner soon after that and that got me totally ready for a good snooze on the sofa with Mum.

I have just got back from a final walkies and and now VERY ready to let my nose do its very bestest rumbling. Shove over on the sofa Mum......put your leg just there please......yep....chin fits nicely there ta! zzzzzzzz........

Mega Zoomies!

We have moved to the bestestest mooring in Newbury. Our garden is the huuuuuuge Northcroft Park - complete with megamassive field for loonyzoomies AND swimmy river! I am in paradise!

It was only a short floatyboatycruise with just one lock and one bridge to work, but oooooooohhhh! This is such a fabbydabby destination!

As soon as Daddy finished making the big rumbler under the back deck move us into place, Mum told me 'OK. Off you go then'. Well...... I was most certainly not going to delay for a millisecond! I think I zoomied so fast my back legs overtook my front ones! It certainly made Mum laugh! Heehee! I did come back to help with the mooring up. Well...... we have new long leads for the floatyboatyhome.....I had to check they work OK. They fit my teeth just nicely - great for a game of tug with Mummy! She did complain at one point that I was pulling the wrong way; apparently the boat needed to go backwards a bit and I was tugging forwards! Well....that just meant an extra good game of tug to rectify the mistake!

Work done, it was time for the very serious business of loonying! I had a fab game of fetch with Mum, using the toy that my PuppyMummy Sue gave me. It is a great toy, both for on the grass and, more importantly, in the river. It floats! So I got to extend the game of fetch into a game of swimmyfetch too!

5 photos:
Three of me playing on the huge field with my orange and blue 3-legged star toy.
Two of me swimming to fetch it back from the river.