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Friday, 24 March 2017

Does she REALLY appreciate me?

Huff! Mum clearly doesn't appreciate my superb interior design talents! She has no taste!

All my designer speckles have disappeared from the warmwall. Plus, after a hard day of workywalkies, getting delightfully soggy and grubby on the underside, I wasn't allowed inside floatyboatyhome until I had gone through the full ritual of 'Sit. Paw' (wipe wipe). 'Other paw' (wipe wipe). 'Stand'. (wipe wipe wipe wipe - chest & belly). 'Turn around' (wipe wipe back legs & paws). Even my doodah got wiped!

I had no sogginess left to redecorate with my big shake

The best contribution I could make to the decor was a neat little puddle of dribble on the floor while Mum did her cheating me thing - cutting my 'good boy treats' into little bits. I squeaked my persuasive squeak well enough though to get one of the bigger yummy chewy dried chicken fillets! Numnumnumnumnum!

Wednesday, 22 March 2017

Techy Oakley...

Padworth Meadow.

Weemails received and read. Replies composed and sent. Interscent thoroughly scanned, searched, surfed and studied. Download completed. Junk box emptied.

Now time to snooze while Mum deals with her correspondence on her clicketyfingerstoy.

I much prefer my version!

Tuesday, 21 March 2017


Blimmin noseband! 'Snaffle-stopper' Mum calls it. 'Opportunity robber' I call it. I sooooo could have got that tasty morsel in the shop....Beef - Mum called it. Yummy temptation I called it. Without the noseband, I might have just about managed to get my jaws around it. With it, Mum has way too much ability to 'direct' my schnozzle away from yummies. Harrruuummpphhh!

Monday, 20 March 2017

Just another Sunday...

Back to something resembling 'normal' life today. Well.....normal.....ish.....in Oakleyworld anyway!

Towpath toddle for a download, then off to church where we met lots of humanfriends - that always means abundant ear rubs and back scratches! Then we went off to an old building. (Mum says we are likely to do of this sort of thing from now on because we have joined something called the National Trust.) It was a sort of little house with a church-like bit attached. There were lots and lots of pictures everywhere and the churchy bit (Mum called it a chapel) was all pictures - the whole thing - every bit of the walls was picture! There was a nice ladyhuman in there who gave Mum a bright light to point at the walls and she helped to describe some of the pictures to her. Dad also had a flappysheet with squiggles on it. He was telling Mum what all the squiggles said about the pictures and the building. I enjoyed the bit of fusses I got from the ladyhuman. The rest of the time though, I just laid down for a rest on the floor.

I did try to persuade Mum towards the door with a little tug and a squeak and a huff, but she told me to lie down again! Humph! We did eventually get outside though and I found some bright yellow flowers to sniff amongst whilst waiting for Dad to do his one-eye-clickybox thing

Once back aboard home, I had to wait while Mum and Dad had one of their hot black water drinks, then it was off for a nice walkies along the towpath and back via the road-route. Then, after dinners, we went to another church meeting. This time, Mum and Dad had to do some yacketying from the front. That meant that I got a brief opportunity to enjoy a lie down on the carpet! The rest of the floor there was shiny-slippy so that carpet-snooze was worth snatching

Photo of me and Mum by the wooden door of the old buidling that we visited. Mum says it is called Sandham Memorial Chapel.

Sunday, 19 March 2017

Brown See Eye Land!

Phoooeeeee! I am compooperated! what a crazybusy couple of days!

We are home again on our floatyboatyhome after a big adventure of a day. First of all, it seems, there was some yacketying to be done with a nice manhuman at the humankennelblock. He was behind a desk so I guess that makes him important. It seems that all the yacketying was all about yesterday's issue at brekkietime. By the end of the yacketying human mouths were turned up at the corners so I guess this was good news. We went into the yummyery area again for human brekkies again today so it must have been OK. I got to make some new human friends while we were there. They asked Mum if they could fuss me. I made the most of the opportunity! Well, it would be so rude to turn down ear rubs and back scratches wouldn't it?

After that, we went back to our kennelroom and all the bags were packed up again and taken down to reload the car. I then workywalkied Mum along the road to another humankennelblock where we found Uncle John and Aunty Judy again. Yayy

Next came the adventure: We went, all together, for a little car ride, then walked to a big floatyboat. I guided Mum up the bouncing slope and then up some steep steps aboard the floatyboat. There was no roof on this floatyboat and it had lots of seats. The cruise was a bit more bumpy than we are used to on our little floatyboatyhome and the wetslosh was a lot bigger than the canals! We cruised for a little while then got off at a place Mum says is called Brown See Eye Land. She says dogs are not allowed in this land but, because I was working, I was allowed. At first, I rather hoped I was going to get a freerun - this whole land was covered in trees and bushes and no roads at all! It would have been the bestest freerun land! But, I was on duty the whole time - ie - all day! I guided Mum around the whole Eye Land. It was lovely work! We walked for miles along a track through woods and meadows. There were some very strange featherballs about the place; they had bright blue long necks and tiny heads with very pointy noses and some of them had huge long tails trailing on the gound. I tried very hard to go play with them but Mum kept telling me to 'Leave'. Huff

The return trip on the big floatyboat took ages and was a bit chilly. We sat right at the very front of the deck with no roof. That meant I got to 'hup' my front paws onto the railing a few times and look where we were going. That made my ears flap in the huffyfuffy air.

Once I had guided Mum back to the car after all this excitement, it was past my dinnertime. Mum used her paws to search around in the car but she didn't find my bag of nosh! I had to wait until we got back to the humankennelblock car park where some bags had been in John and Judy's car. I don't know how I survived so long, but I did at least finally get my starvation alleviation in that carpark. Phew!!

We then said our goodbyes to Judy and John and we headed off for a brief call at Granny Grandpa's flat. I waited in the car while Mum and Dad popped in to collect a few things, then we had the long drive back to Aldermaston to home

I wandered briefly along the towpath to find the right place to leave my big weemail to announce my return then hopped aboard home. I got straight up on my bed (the sofa) to get out of Mum and Dad's way while they brought bags aboard, stroked the floor and made the hotbox start to glow. All this has made my eyelids incredibly heavy and, well, now Mum has joined me so I have a very comfy pillow on her leg........zzzzzzzzzz......

Photo shows me sitting by a big stone with squiggles on it. This was on our walk around Brown See Eye Land. Apparently this is something to do with some famous manhuman who started something called the Scouts and Guides - I couldn't smell any hint of any Guide Dog colleagues though. Is a scout a breed of dog?

Saturday, 18 March 2017

Naughty Human Tried to Ban Me!

Hengistbury Head! Yipppeeeee!

Last night, we went out to a human yummyery where we met up with Aunty John and Uncle Judy. That made my tail all waggy. We haven't seen them is quite some while. Of course, the venue meant snooze time for me but I did get one tiny morsel at the end of their noshing. That was a yummy bit of steak that fell my way! Mum said I can't have tasted it because it didn't touch the sides as it went down! It was worth having!

This morning, we went down to the yummyery here in the humankennelblock. I guided Mum to a seat as she asked me to do. That was fine; we settled down and I began dreaming of the hope of sausages and bacon..... Then a ladyhuman workyperson came up and said that we weren't allowed to sit there because of me! Mum was not happy about this and nor was Dad. They explained that I am a Guide Dog and therefore I should be there. They wanted us to sit in the seats by the door - away from the yummyery. After Mum explained that they couldn't do that, and that it was equivalent to a wheelchair user being refused in with their wheels, they said OK. Mum and Dad did get to have their brekkie (and I did get a little bit of sausage that Mum dropped - heehee!). Afterwards though, Mum was using her talkybone and she was talking to some of the nice people at my HQ. Apparently some 'education' is on the way for the humanpeoples here.

The rest of the day has been wonderful - we took John and Judy to Hengistbury Head. I luuuuuuurrrve HengyHead! It is the bestest freerun place around! We went all the way up to the top where the air was very fuffy! We stayed still up there for a while - it was a bit odd! Dad and Judy got some big tub things out of a bag and emptied a whole load of dusty stuff out. We all stood for a bit longer while they were saying things about Granny and Grandpa. I joined in with a little squeak too! Then we continued the freerun down the hobblybobbly steps and all the way along the beach to the end - and all the way back again! It was FANTABULOUS! I meeted and greeted and played with several passing pooch pals on the way but generally just enjoyed the freedom!!

Now I'm pooped - and it seems I still have workywalkies to do - so a quick power nap is in order before Mum harnesses me up again......

Friday, 17 March 2017

Yet another Human Kennelblock...

One night back aboard our floatyboatyhome and now we are in a humankennelblock in Bournemouth! Life never stays boring does it?

Home was a bit niffy! Not because of me or any emissions! It was because of the sticky stinky stuff that Richard the boatymendyman had stroked all over the wood things he has built. Phooooaaarrrr! It sure did pong! So, today, we have left him to continue to work in the ponginess and we have been for some workywalkies around Newbury, including a yacketying session with a manhuman in a human yummyery. Then, after a drive with the car loaded with bags, we arrived at Granny & Grandpa's flat. It is sooooo different inside now! The carpets have all gone, the walls are all white and smooth and there is no furniture! My humanbuddyman was there doing some wall-stroking with a rollystick thing that made strange shthshth noises as he used it. It was making the wall all white. I got some fantabulous ear rub fusses from him. I like him!

We left there and drove a little way to a different bit of Bournemouth and now we are in a humankennelblock. After a nice long wander around town, I think it is time for a good snooze. Apparently, my work is not yet done for today though - Mum seems to be suggesting that we are going out again soon.......