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Thursday, 29 December 2016

Dad's got a new Wheelybag....

Uh-Oh! Mum is clearing out a cupboard. She has emptied everything out of it and is now in overdrive with a stroking cloth and a bottle of squirt. Time for me to take Dad out of the way!

Earlier, I took Mum on a great workywalkies. We strutted our stuff along the towpath, up into town. Mum asked me to 'Find Wilko'. I had to work blimmin hard weaving her in and out and around all the crowds but I took her straight into Wilko's! Just inside the door, my triumphant bum hit the floor with a clear bump to make sure I got my edible proof of my cleverness! It made a couple of ladies laugh and, of course, that meant I got some fusses too!

The next bit of my duty was up through the rest of town and then along the busy road, down the slope into the tunnels under the road, up the other side, along the other busy road, across the triple crossing, then across the carpark. I did all this perfectly but Mum was sooo wrong! She said 'Not today. Straight on' as we came to the door of Pets at Home! How could she? That was a huge mistake on her part, I'm sure! Even the doors knew it was the right place to go - they opened for us to go in! But no! She was not persuadable. I simply had to guide her on to Lidl's - the next shop along. Huffffffey Huff Huff Huff!

Once we got to Lidl's, I guided Mum to the trolley park. There were only a few little trolleys left so I had to take Mum quite a long way down the line. She put her shinydisk into the slot and got a trolley and asked me to 'back back'. Well, I thought I had a better idea; I ducked under the rail. Then I came to a halt when my lead boinged on the leg of the rail half way down the line! Oops! Not such a good idea after all! A bit of jiggling sorted that problem out, then Mum asked me to 'go ahead' down the line and she followed with her trolley behind her. Problem solved!

Working around a shop without Dad means I get to show my skills in guiding not only Mum but also the trolley. Mum lies the handle of my harness on my back and holds my lead on the handlebar of the trolley. We take it quite slowly because she has to be very careful not to bump into anything or anyone, but I still manage to steer her around obstacles (there are usually lots of them in Lidl's!) and she still asks me to 'find left', 'find right', 'go straight on', 'wait' etc. Actually, there is a lot of 'wait'! It takes her ages to scan the shelves to find what she wants. From time to time, she stops and gets her talkybone out of her pocket. She tippety taps at it and it talks to her - saying things like 'Carrots. Potatoes. Mushrooms.......' Today, it seems, she successfully found everything it told her to find. I need to find out how to sort that thing out though; It failed to tell her to get anything truly important (well....it did say carrots, I suppose) - there was no mention of dog treats, chewies, bones.......

The final command on a shopping trip is always 'find the checkout'. I like that one. It means we are on our way out again, but it almost always gives me a chance to nudge someone in the back of the legs while we wait in the queue. That almost always succeeds in getting me some fusses! Heehee! Well, I have to alleviate the boredom of waiting somehow don't I?

While we were waiting at the checkout queue, Dad appeared with his wheeliebag. All the goodies got packed into that, and into Mum's backpack, and we all set off on the workywalkies back to our floatyboatyhome. Once again though, the Pets at Home doors opened as we got to them. Once again, Mum got it all wrong and said 'Not today. Straight on'.

What with failing to go the right way, and then with stroking the inside of a cupboard, I really do wonder about her sometimes......

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