I really wonder about my humans...

Humans just get weirder

 

Today, we drove to Newbury, then walked to Victoria Park where we met a nice ladyhuman. Mum and Dad did a whole load of yacketying with this ladyhuman: Something about hiring the park for a fete in June - I have no idea what this means but it sounds kinda exciting I think. This was all OK because, while they were yacketying, I got to show off my best nutbum zoomies when a poochpal came along and persuaded Mum to remove my harness and let me play!

Next came a bit of workywalkies around town, then a stop in a human hot-brown-drink place in a tiny little twitten. I got some fusses and admiration in there! :) Then came the weirdest happening: We went into the big open bit of town where there are sometimes shops with flappy walls. No flappy shops today but lots of humans - many of them dressed in peculiar fursubstitutes. They all lined up and, when a big loud dingaling dingalinged, they started running. They were carrying flat bowls on sticks (rather like the ones Mum sometimes uses in the kitchen) and, at different stages of the running thing, they stopped, kind of flapped the flat bowls into the air and sent a flat disc up. They then tried to catch the flat disk again in the flat bowl, then ran a bit further! Huhhhh??????

Apparently, this was all great fun and much appreciated by the noisy onlooking crowds who did loads of barking and howling and banging of front paws. It gave me chance to gain a few fusses!

Next came a pleasant wander along the towpath before getting back into the car to return to our temporary floatyboatyhome. After some further bone work, I went with Mum and Dad to check out our own floatyboatyhome. It has some new bits in the lounge area. The sofa doesn't look too comfy though - it has no cushions! I hope that is sorted out - it will make a very hard bed as it is! The warmrain room is rather odd now - it has no doors and bits are missing. The actual warmrainbox is still there though - no escaping that then!

This evening, Dad seems to have disappeared. Mum says he has gone to drive a big bus! That meant that I had to take Mum for a nice leisure walkies before my dinner. I managed to lead her happily to the best possible place to go - Padworth Meadow! Heehee! I had a great time zigzagging aroudn there while Mum plodded carefully around the pathway. It meant that my dinner was a bit late but I just about managed to survive!

I Went to the Beach!

Now that was what I call a good day of travelling. Not so much the actual car-riding bit - that's just boring - and a bit scary when the sky leaks coz it makes nasty loud shoosshy noises around the round humps in the boot where I travel. The destination was good though - Bournemouth!

Workywalkes around town to take Mum to Specsavers again - this time in a downstairs bit where a lady checked the tiny little squishy bowls that Mum seems to be putting in her eyes these days. It makes her look different - no eye windows! All seems to be declared good and Mum's mouth was up at the corners! I like that shape! Then we were off for more workywalkies - this time to a human yummyery. I was a good boy and snoozed under the table all the while Mum and Dad were noshing and they didn't drop even an atom! Huff! So, I grabbed my opportunity as soon as Mum stood up to leave: I nipped round into the next booth where a very nice manhuman and ladyhuman had dropped some hooverings! I did my duty and it made their mouths turn up at the corners too. For some peculiar reason, Mum didn't seem entirely impressed with my dutiful cleaning service! She apologised to the people for my cheek! I don't think that was at all necessary!

Next came a quick visit to Granny and Grandpa's flat where we found the nice manhumans who are doing lots of strange things to the walls and ceilings. It smelled really strange in there and one of the manhumans was stroking the ceiling with a funny flat thing and some smelly goo! Some of the walls were covered in that same goo too - but it was dry. There also seems to be a new miniroom in what was Granny's bedroom. Of course, there was a whole load of yacketying to be done, but I did get some nice fusses from those manhumans. I like them!

We then hopped back into the car and - oh! Joy of joys! We went ot the beach! Yaaaayyyhayyyyy! I got a freerun on the beach! I love the beach! I did big huge zoomies all over the beach! I ran and chased with a chocolate labrador on the beach! I digged the sand on the beach! I did more zoomies on the beach.......Oooooh! It was fab on the beach!

Now we are back aboard our temporary floatyboatyhome again in Aldermaston and I need to do a bit more work on my bone.

Did I mention I went to the beach?

Sunday.

Schweeeesh! What a day!

A shortish workywalkies with Mum - ending in a very brief but just-about-worth-having freerun in Padworth Village Hall meadow (that will never be as good again though - not unless Puppy Leo comes back!), then a ride to church. No time for my usual hoovering duties afterwards today though - we were off for another car ride - this time ending at Debbi and Ryan's house - with the huge wonderful garden - and the very noisy shiny roary-birds going overhead. We only stayed a little while - just long enough for Dad and Ryan to bring a whole load of boxes in from the car for Debbi to unpack (nothing interesting inside. Nothing edible) and for mugs of that hot black/brown water to be drunk.
 
 Next came another car ride - this time ending at a big building in Newbury. A building we have been to before, but this was a different thing going on. There were lots of people in rows of seats. We joined them (well, I wasn't on a seat of course!). Part way through, I had to guide Mum up some steps and onto the highfloor. Mum got given a black lollipop and did some yacketying into it. It was wierd; I could hear her next to me as well as from the other end of the hall! Do I have two Mums? One normal and one all boomy loud

After this sitting in rows bit, which included lots of different people doing lollipop yacketying, plus some human howling accompanied by all sorts of bangbangtoys, twangtwangtoys, black-and-white-teeth-toys and tootyparpytoys, we went to the back of the big hall. There we stood by a table with loads of flappysheets and a couple of clicketyfingerstoys on it. I just had to stand there, look handsome and absorb all the fusses and admiration. Mum and Dad, along with friends, John and Barbara, did oooooooodles of yacketying and giving out of flappysheets. I did get my picnic dinner here. That bit was good! The bestest bit though was meeting Henry - a fellow Guide Dog. Henry and I have met before and it was nice to sniff-greet again. Henry is a very tall black labrador x retriever. (No shorty jokes please @StephenGardner!

Now, having been to a human yummyery on the way (I had a bit of hoovering opportunity there - some of those little yellowish stick things on the floor just couldn't be left!, we are back aboad our (temporary) floatyboatyhome

Time for a bit of bone-munching work methinks. Well, it is Sunday! Sunday is not complete without bone work!

Conned.

HOOOOOOWWWWWWLLLLLLL! I have been seriously conned! Somebody please call the neenaws!

Mum is a right old meaniebum!

I have worked my paws off in the crowded shoppyplace in Reading today - weaving our way through all the humans scurrying around. That was all fine. I did a good job. Mum said so!

So, I happily hop back into the car. We ride back to the boatykennelplace. I hop out of the car (after waiting for permission). I do as I'm told and go busy boy (That corner of the wall needed a wash anyway!). I set off for a bit of a wander around to catch up on the gossip I've missed while we've been out, leaving a few weemails in the process. This is all fine. Mum then calls me aboard the boat on the promise of a 'new bone'. I almost skidded off the other side of the deck in my obedience to get 'on the boat' in response. I go down the steps and wait patiently while Mum takes off her outer fursubstitutes. I wait still longer while she takes off her pawcovers. I sit perfectly in anticipation of my new bone. Mum opens the white cupboard, gets out a rustly bag containing my bone. I get all excited, tail in overdrive, mouth dripping.......and she says "Oooh It's frozen" and promptly puts it in the sink! Hoooooowwwwwwllllll! I had to make do with a couple of meazly little treats! She says I can't have a frozen bone. She says my tongue will get stuck on it. Haaarrrrrruuuuummmmmppppphhhhhh!

So, that means I came rocketing in on a false promise! NOT FAIR!

As if that con wasn't enough, I then sat and carefully watched Mum unpacking some packs of my treats. That was when I discovered the other con: When I have believed I have been getting a treat for good work, it turns out I have only been getting a fraction of a treat! Mum took all those yummy meaty strips and meaty sticks - laid them on the big block on the worktop - then attacked them with a shiny choppystick! So, each one became SIX little bits! HOOOOOOWWWWWLLLLLL again! That means I have to do six Goodboy things to get just ONE full treat!

Mum says it is to preserve my waistline. Well, if she carries on like that then just one of those meaty strips will go around my waistline! I will look like a greyhound!

Where are those neenaws?

Playdate!

I have a new best buddy. Guide Dog Puppy Leo (6 month old German Shepherd x Golden Retriever) came to play in the meadow in Aldermaston.

Leo is only 6 months old but he is hooooooge! His legs go on forever! I am deeply offended - Mum says he is super gorgeous! Oi! I think I am supposed to the the one who gets that kind of compliment!
It was a fabtabulous day though. I got to enjoy a good old romp and sniff around the meadow before Leo arrived - then the fun began! We did the bestest running and romping and chasing and chewing and rolling and.......well, just doing what a good, self-respecitng pair of Guide Dogs do when given freedom

I taught him what to do with a big chunky stick too. He watched and learned from the master! These jaws just have to be strength-tested from time to time and there is nothing better than a good chomp on a big log! Leo pinched it off me at one point but he was daft enough to put it down again! he didn't keep it for long

Alas, our playtime was not super long because Leo's humans (oh! Err.... I suppose I should have mentioned them! Stephen and Jacquie - our humanfriends from way oop north so we don't see them often enough! They are churchy people as well as Guide Dog Puppy Walkers) had to leave to go pick up some other humans. We did have to go to a human yummyery first - that was nice - we stayed outside! Apparently the skyglowball was warm enough for the humans to endure noshing in the garden. That meant that Leo and I kind of got away with a bit more kanoodling than we would have done inside that tiny yummyery place! Heehee

I hope Leo comes back soon - it was a smashing playdate!

Gleaming handsomeness! Close up of me lying on grass with sun making my black coat gleam. My bum is top left of picture, chest bottom right, head looking towards LHS.

A quiet few moments lying down on the grass.

Stick chewing time. Me in the foreground with a big chunky stick. Leo is learning - with a little stubby twig.

Leo watching the master.

Happily chewing!

A tangle of dogs! Leo in the foreground, me behind, all ears flapping, tails wagging, paws off the ground.

Leo watching closely as I get to work on this rather splendid chunk of wood. Me lying down, facing the camera with the large piece of branch between my front paws. Leo beside me standing watching intently.

Me protecting my stick!

Surveying the scene.

Huff, Huff and Triple Huff!

Huffety Fuffety Smack. That about sums up this morning's workywalkies!

I took Mum on a long workywalkies on yet another new route - new to both of us! Dad had been staring at his pooter and then gave Mum directions for the way to go. Of course, I was listening too and off we set. It was a longish walkies along a very busy road. (Of course, we were on the pavement, but the cars and big chuggy lorries were wizzing by us on the road). The pavement then dipped away onto a path a little bit away from the road. That was nicer but it was still very very huffyfuffy. Sometimes, it made Mum wobble and struggle to walk against it. It made my ears flap and stick out sideways - a most twerpy look! Several times, the huffyfuffy air picked up twigs, rubbish and even small branches and smacked me with them! The worst one was a prickly branch that got launched straight at my nose! Not impressed! It would have been much more tolerable if it fuffed something yummy at me!

I did have to work hard for Mum - she says that the huffety fuffety air was making it hard for her to hear what the traffic was doing and we had quite a lot of little sideroads to cross. I did good though! We made it safely to a place where we stopped and waited for Dad to find us in the car. Then we went on for a bit more work - but in a rather more calm environment; Sainsbury's! It was all good though - we got carrots! I even got a little carrot at the checkout! Yummmmm!

This evening, after evening walkies, we went out again! Always exciting! We went to a nice big house where we found lots of human friends. I got to meet and greet and glean fusses from them all! I ALMOST got to hoover a nice big crumb off the low table but meanie Mum 'Oi-ed' me just a micromoment too soon. Hufff!

Blogger.com!

OK, I'm sat here at the pooter, my clicketypaws are ready for action........what sins do I have to confess today?

I do believe the answer is truly 'none'! I have been a good boy! I took Mummy for a nice workywalkies this morning - on a route we have never done before. I have taken Daddy walkies that way, but in the opposite direction, once, but this was a first for Mum. I must have done a good job of it because we seemed to end up in the freerun meadow place! Heehee! Well....it WAS on the way! And I had worked hard and done a good job of guiding Mum....... She enjoyed the wander around in the peace and quiet anyway! She was happily listening to all the featherballs doing their singing thing while I got on with the important task of catching up on all the doggygossip weemails.

This afternoon, Mum and Dad have both hijacked the pooters and have been totally engrossed in their clicketyfingersing stuff so I have simply had to get down to some serious work on my latest bone!

Photo shows me sitting at the table with a laptop open in front of me, looking very pensive.

Hot Huffing Froth Monsters.

Back in action! Workywalkies around Newbury! Yayyyy! Mum only had to remind me a few times to resist a sniff at a corner or a tree......ahem!

It was good to be strutting my stuff again and I think Mum was happy too! We wandered around town a bit and I remembered where to 'Find Tesco', 'Find Costa' (where I got to lie down for a snooze while there was loads of human yacketying going on) and 'Find Sainsbury's'. This all included a stroll along the towpath. That was good until we came to a stretch where some manhumans were vzvzvzvzvzvzvzvzing at some trees with noisy toys. I didn't like the noisy toys and I REALLY did't like the hot crackly, sparky, smoky, stinky piles of treebits they were doing. I didn't want to go past but Mum told me it was OK and we survived the passage!

Mum then asked me to 'Find the bridge' and we went up and over the canal and straight on up the road, across at the kerb, then on again. Next instruction was to 'find the door right'. I did, of course, but I kinda wish I hadn't! Inside that door was a worst dream come real! The whole place was full of huge frothmonster machines and hothuff machines! EEEEEK! One of the frothmonsters was already busy churning its huge mouth around a whole load of Mum and Dad's fursubstitutes. When it finally allowed Dad to open its mouth, everything was removed and fed to a hothuff machine. Apparently, this is good and pleasing to humans! Huh??? I just kept a low profile by lying down. I did sneak a couple of fusses from willing volunteers . It all turned good at the end though when our pals Terry and Tracy came in to feed their fursubstitutes to a hothuff machine. I enjoyed a wondrous waggy licky kissy reunion – especially with Terry’s ears! Yummmm!

Me in front of the hothuff machine that was huffmunching Mum and Dad’s fursubstitutes.

A bigger view of me in front of lots of the beastie machines.

I'm Back!!!!

Mummy and Daddy came back! Team Clarke reunited! Yaaaayyyyyy!

My tail went a tad berserk when the dingdong dinged and Aunty Julie opened it. I have had a fantabulous time on my holibobs with Aunty Julie and Uncle Paul, but I was megawaggyhappy to be reunited with Mummy and Daddy.

We have returned to a floatyboatyhome, but it is not OUR floatyboatyhome. That seems to be tethered in front of us, but we are on a dinky little one. I don't understand, but I don't care...... sofasnuggles with Mummy is welcome no matter which boat!

Here is a little photo montage of my hollibobs time. I have played with Patterson the Guide Dog Puppy in training, plus his buddy Josca the withdrawn Guide Dog Stud Breeder boy, plus a greyhound named Izzy. I have had walkies and freeruns EVERY day! I have played with lots of toys and snoozed in front of the crackly sizzly hot thing in the wall. I have had a luxury posh pooch bed and oodles of space to stretch out and explore. It has been fantabulous! THANK YOU for having me Aunty Julie and Uncle Paul.

Me with my big rawhide chewbar. Standing holding it in my mouth in Julie's lounge. Wooden floor, sofa behind me.

Me enjoying a cozy snooze in front of roaring open fire. Lying on fluffy grey rug with brick fireplace containing open fire. Basket of logs on LHS, bucket of coal on RHS.

Playdate with Josca. Me standing by Josca's head, Josca lying on his back with his best bits nearest camera, legs wide apart, head twisted round playing with me. Josca is a fluffy golden retriever.

Playtime with Izzie the Greyhound.

Guide Dogs are not supposed to play with sticks! Well, I am not playing with it, I rescued it from the cold ground! Look, I even have a mouthful of grass that I rescued too!

Playing on the white crunchy grass on Greenham Common. Wearing my hi-viz yellow numpty coat that has very wrong instructions printed in squiggles on it. It says "Off Duty Guide Dog" Well...that bit is right, but then it says "Do not feed me". I'm sure that word 'not' shouldn't be there!

Please play with pink oinky pig with me.

From Left to Right - Me, Patterson the Guide Dog pup, and Josca. Snelsmore Common. All three of us sitting on the grass with wintery trees behind us.

Me Patterson and Josca again. I think I may have got a bit distracted. The two goody-four-pawses are still sitting! Oops!

Me, Patterson and Josca sitting on tarmac surface, humans legs and a wooden seat behind us.

MUD! glorious mud! Freerun with Patterson and Josca through the wooded area of Snelsmore Common.

I had to pose for this one! Sitting on grass, looking handsome!

Pupdate

This is Mummy hijacking Oakley's page to update you.

Oaks is having a fabulous time with his lovely boarder Julie. He has had playdates with fellow Guide Dog stock (mainly Patterson, a Retriever puppy in training nad Josca a beautiful withdrawn Stud Dog).) He is enjoying his social time with these lads, plus wonderful freeruns on Greenham Common, Snellsmore Common (two definite favourite places) plus other local parks and meadows too. He is getting to enjoy relaxing in front of a real log fire and is just generally loving a good time ot complete R&R.

His holibob time hs been extended until Monday evening because our floatyboatyhome is not yet finished and so we are having to move to another temporary accommodation aboard a hireboat. After discussion, Julie and I concluded that he would be better staying with her while we make the transition rather than come to the hotel where we are until Saturday, then endure the upheaval of the move to the temp boat. Instead, we will get settled aboard and then collect him from Julie after a trip to Bournemouth on Monday.
One of the reasons for boarding him for a holiday was to give him a complete break from all the travelling and changes going on. We are certain that this has been a good decision. Oaks is having a wonderful time and it has given us the opportunity to make the most of our relaxation time in the hotel too. It has also meant that he has avoided a couple of long car journeys. We are sure that a good run with a buddy or two is far preferable to spending hours in the car!

I am missing my baby boy SOOOOO much, but know that he is enjoying his holibobs and benefitting from the R&R - much needed by all of us.

Hollibobs for Meeeeeee!

Ooooooohhhhhh! Mummy is packing my suitcase..... but not hers and Daddy's! She says I am going for hollibobs. A nice lady called Julie has invited me to play for a few days. i think I have heard mention that she lives very near to Guide Dog Puppy Patterson - I sincerely hope this means a playdate or two might be on the horizon!

This means that I will not be posting on here for a few days. Mum won't let me take her clicketyfingerstoy with me! So I guess I shall have to say tattybye for a little while. I shall fill you in when I get back.

Right.....Patterson......I'm on my way.....

Little White Clouds...

"A true professional". That's what the nice manhuman called me! Well, thank you Sir! I will happily accept that accolade!

I have been truly back in my proper work mode today! It has been great! I have really strutted my stuff guiding Mum around very unfamiliar streets, crossings, shops and paths in Reading. There have been a few familiar bits too - but we haven't been here for quite some time so it was all good working practice for me. I tried to sneak the occasional sniff of the local gossip on street corners and trees, but Mum didn't let me get away with that! Huff! I did manage to con(vince) her a few times that I needed a wee though, so I did get to exchange a few messages with the locals.

This afternoon, I got to hoover a few of those little crunchy white clouds when we went into one of those big dark places with seats-up-steps and the big talking picture wall. I also got a nice snooze while the wall did all its noisy stuff. Mum had ear covers on that were telling her all about what was going on on that big wall. She was really engrossed and enjoying it. This meant that she was a bit extra messy with the little crunchy clouds. I got myself into the perfect position to hoover up her messiness without moving! Heehee!"A true professional". That's what the nice manhuman called me! Well, thank you Sir! I will happily accept that accolade!

I have been truly back in my proper work mode today! It has been great! I have really strutted my stuff guiding Mum around very unfamiliar streets, crossings, shops and paths in Reading. There have been a few familiar bits too - but we haven't been here for quite some time so it was all good working practice for me. I tried to sneak the occasional sniff of the local gossip on street corners and trees, but Mum didn't let me get away with that! Huff! I did manage to con(vince) her a few times that I needed a wee though, so I did get to exchange a few messages with the locals.

This afternoon, I got to hoover a few of those little crunchy white clouds when we went into one of those big dark places with seats-up-steps and the big talking picture wall. I also got a nice snooze while the wall did all its noisy stuff. Mum had ear covers on that were telling her all about what was going on on that big wall. She was really engrossed and enjoying it. This meant that she was a bit extra messy with the little crunchy clouds. I got myself into the perfect position to hoover up her messiness without moving! Heehee!

Holibobbbs...

We are in a humankennelblock! I think this means it is time to relax! Aaaaaahhhhhhh! All that packing and sorting is done! Granny/Grandpa's flat is empty. A nice man came this morning and started using a funny huffy thing to huff the wall in one of the rooms - then he used a shiny thing to scrape off the huffed wall-skin! Most peculiar! We left him to it.

I took Mum walkies while Dad finished off getting everything packed and into the car. This was a good move on our part! It started off good and just got better! A quick jog around the Clifftop Park led on down the zigzag and on to big zoomies on the beach! As if that wasn't fun enough - we walked on along the beach (well, Mum walked - I zoomed and sniffed and romped and rolled and zoomed a bit more!) towards the stickyout platform and we met up with Alfie! (Oh - and his humans too!). Alfie is a 4-and-a-half-month-old Guide Dog Puppy in Training. He is a black 3 quarters labrador, 1 quarter retriever. More importantly, he was fabulous fun! We had a wonderufl, fantabulous, amazing, fandabbydoozee time racing and rolling and chasing and - well - playing boydog games alll over the acres of lovely sand! It was the bestest morning I have had for ages! Thanks Alfie - oh - and thanks Carol and Mr Carol - Alfie's PuppyWalkers! I love you! I needed that!

Photo - taken by Alfie's Puppydaddy - shows us both doing a 'sit' on the beach - Alfie is on the left, a little smaller than me. I am on the right with a huge a tongue-out smile on my face. Behind us is the vast expanse of sand of Bournemouth beach.

Topsy Turvy Land!

Eeeeekkkk! The whole world is now in boxes! Stacks and stacks of boxes. Mum seems to have gone into some kind of crazed overdrive with a ring thing - she keeps pulling off its skin from around and around it - then she sticks the skin all over the tops of these boxes and it seems to hold them shut. The then uses a very smelly markystick to squiggle strange markings on the boxes.

This morning a nice manhuman came and, after I had seized my opportunity for a fantablulous licky-waggy-megafuss greeting with him, he then joined forces with Dad in removing all the boxes and all the furniture. Granny and Grandpa's flat is now vast but very bare. It is all very strange and a bit unsettling. Mummycuddles needed - that makes it all feel better and safer.

I took Mum workywalkies into town this morning - that was a very welcome stint of normality. We went a new route to get there, via a shop where Mum did things the wrong way around! Surely, it is normal to leave a shop with items from the shop. Instead, when I took Mum to the checkout, she opened her backbag, took out a box and gave it to the ladyhuman at the checkout! She did the same in the little post office too! Life sure is topsy turvy!

The next bit was a bit more normal - Mum asked me to 'find Specsavers'. That involved a walk all the way around to the other side of town. No problem though. We went straight there and in the door. The nice ladyhuman in there did some strange twiddling things to Mum's new eyewindows. This seemed to make Mum's mouth go up at the corners. That made my tail wag!

My tail did a heck of a lot more wagging on the final bit of the trip though - I guided Mum back via the pawmenade and she let me enjoy a lovely FREERUN! Yippee! BIG zoomies on the soggy sand! I found a couple of doggy pals to play with too. That was very welcome! Thanks Mum!

Crunch!

Everything seems to be getting packed into boxes or black rustlybags. I have kept out of the way! I don't think I would fit into one of the boxes and I certainly don't want to end up in a black rustlybag - they all seem to disappear into the big wheeliebins outside and they never come out again! I think every single thing from Granny and Grandpa's flat is now packed away. Mum has had a few leaky eyes so I came out of hiding to sort her out!

We had a little excitement on this morning's workywalkies! It appeared at first to be destined for a boring wander into Westbourne. On the way, however, the boredom was interrupted by a big crunch. Just in front of us, a big yellow bus stopped at the bus stop and a big car biffed it up the bum! The manhuman who was driving the car didn't seem to be very happy. He was shouting some naughty words. He didn't seem impressed with the bus driver for stopping. Another manhuman joined in and told him off for using his talkybone while he was driving. Mr big car driver then got all leaky-eyed and pleaded not to be reported! He said he couldn't afford any more spots on his lie sense. I have no idea what all that means but I dragged Mum to the bus door and onto the bus to check out all the people aboard. I could smell that they were upset and afraid. Mum called out to ask if anyone was hurt and they said they were all fine - just shaken. I desperately wanted to go to each of them to check them and give them my loves, but Mum wouldn't let me. The noisy neenaws were arriving, so we left them to it and continued on our boring route to the Post Office and back.

I have got Megateddy back now. I'm working hard on getting him smelling proper again.

New Eyewindows...

Annie was hugenormous! Three of me in one dog! Mum says she was a Saint Bernard. Her manhuman said her numbers are 90kg! That is bigger than three of me! She was rather nice though! I tried to get her to play with me but, after just a couple of lumbering ferlumphs of her enormous paws, she was too tired to chase me anymore. She just bumbled over and leaned against Mum. Annie's little doggybrother was riding in a wheelieseat! He was a three-legged Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Apparently he has some little beastie called Arthur Eye Toes in his other shoulder (the one with a paw still attached to it) and so can't walk very far. He was good to sniffygreet though.

Shortly before meeting these two no-chase buddies, I had had a good game of chase and ....wellllll.....boydog games with a fellow black Labrador called Jasper. He was great fun.

Before that, I had guided Mum along the pawmenade. She didn't let me freerun today - she said the ocean was way too angry and she didn't want me running near it. It was rather noisy-lumpy-frothy!

All of this came after taking Mum to Specsavers to get her new eyewindows. She says they are making her feel a bit sozzled because they are very different and will take some getting used to. I'm sure I heard the lady in Specsavers say they were fairy fossils.......

Smelly Bear...

We dogs are the ones with the superb sense of smell. So why oh why do humans think they can decide what smell is acceptable and what is not?

My poor megateddy has been subjected to the utter horrors of being fed to the frothmonster! Mum declared him stinky and stuffed him into that big round mouthed thing! He is now hanging, looking very sad indeed, over a frame, in front of the warmbox. I shall have to rescue him soon and get him back to his proper smell again.

Poor Teddy...

I got Laughed at! HUFF!!!!

Catch up time. After all the excitement of the portrait draw yesterday, I didn't tell you about the nice red and white striped man in the red and white striped shop! He was a very nice man! I like him a lot! I think I have forgiven him for not having any bones last time we went there. This time, he not only gave me two bones, but also a serriously yummy thing. He said it was an ox tail. Well, I have no idea what an ox is, but it's tail was absolutely scrummylicious!

This was a nice reward for doing my duty guiding Mum. Dad abandoned us again - apparently he had to go to a humanvets a long way away to have something called a meddy call so he can drive big buses again. I don't understand, but I do know that I had to work my paws off in really yucky leakysky weather. I had to guide her into Westbourne, find the post office, then find the bus stop. After a bit of a ride on the bus, we were in a new place. I think it must have been some kind of bus playpark because there were loads of buses there! I had to find the door to take Mum inside something called the Dolphin Centre. Once we had walked through some of this place, we recognised a bit! Next command was 'find Boots'. Well, that I can do. No problem! Straight there, in the door - and - triumphant bum bounce! Well.....Mum did say 'clever boy!' Clever boys get yummies for being clever! Heehee!

Next it was 'find upstairs', then we were in the humanvets place where we found the nice lady Kara who is trying to sort out Mummy's ouchy back paws. Kara did some strange things with sticky squidgy stuff and big shiny snippyspikes and Mum's pawcover thingies. She also yipped something about injections into Mum's back paws. Mum really doesn't seem to be too impressed with that idea. Thankfully, it didn't happen this time. I got to take her home without spikes or nasty happenings.

The return journey was even more soggy and horrible. I really don't like working in the wet! Mum kept trying to tell me that we would get dry sooner if I stopped ploddypawsing and got on with the job. Hufff! I just don't do 'huppup' when I have drips in my eyes! The stop off in the yummyshop to meet that nice manhuman was a good respite! I liked that bit. Mum wouldn't let me carry the bag though!

Daddy did come back after it got dark and I was glad to see him again. I had to take him out again in the evening and the sogginess was a bit less soggy by then so it was OK.

Today, I took Mum into town via the Clifftop Park and she was really kind to me! Not only did she let me freerun through the park, but also down the zigzag path and onto the beach! Woooohooooo! Did I have a fab time! I found three pup pals to play a mega chase game with. There was a 5-month old English Setter with his 'brother' a 7-month old Gordon Setter, then along came a Rhodesian Ridgeback pup whose name or age I simply didn't get to find out - we were far too busy having a fantastic time running, rolling and chasing!

In town, a lady in a shop laughed at me because, she said, I looked all serious and professional in my harness - except for the blob of sand on my nose! Oops! That isn't part of the uniform is it?!!